Have you seen this site? Skin Deep is a web site devoted to freaking you out about the crap you are putting on your body (and your children’s bodies) every goddamn day. It rates products from 0-10, with 10 being that the body part subjected to its horrendous ingredients will immediately fall off upon product application.

My diaper rash creme of choice? A five. Not terrible, but not great. Probably only one of my daughter’s butt cheeks are going to fall off. Until you consider that its main ingredient, Phenol, scores a 10. Phenol is banned for cosmetic use in Canada and restricted for use in Japan. And I have put it on my chidren at least once a week every week of their diaper-wearing lives. One of the main issues is reproductive toxicity. That’s awesome, considering I put it within half an inch of my daughter’s va-jay-jay before I dropped her off at daycare this morning. It also has cancer causing agents in it. That should work out well, since my va-jay-jay itch creme also scored an eight. Maybe we can get a deal at the va-jay-jay oncologist? (You know I don’t think this is funny, but I respond to stress and anger with humor, sometimes innappropriately so.)

My baby wash scored a four, but the fragrances in it are an eight. The baby sunscreen I used to use scored a 2, but I switched to a spray this year, and it’s a five. Freakin’ convenience purchases. Of course, choosing to avoid the danger all together and burn my children to a crisp in the Kansas sun is not rated, but I think we can assume it’s at least, what, an eight?

My toothpaste scored a five. Its active ingredient, sodium flouride, causes cancer, has reproductive and developmental toxicity, and is toxic to your nervous system, organs, and endocrine system. But, on the upside, I’ve only had one cavity in my whole life.

My deodorant was a four. I think that’s an acceptable risk given the alternative, right?

The problem with the site is that there isn’t data for many of the ingredients in the products we use every day. This creates what are called data gaps. So, these products could be even worse for us than we know. It’s doubtful that somewhere in that data gap there is research that your products are in any way redeeming (other than the benefit of socially expected hygiene.) How could this happen, you ask?

Because the FDA does not require cosmetics products to be approved as safe before they are sold, companies can put unlimited amounts of toxic chemicals in cosmetics.

So… hmph. Let me weigh my options.

My kids are the stinky kids…. or….. my kids are the ones with a neurotoxin-induced twitch.

Now, this site does help you find products that are on the safer end, most of which I cannot purchase in my corner of Kansas, and cannot afford to procure online. However, I will be using it to inform my upcoming purchases. If I have a choice between a product ranked at a three versus an eight, I will spend a few extra cents. I don’t plan to throw anything out. Except my diaper creme. I just called daycare and asked them to throw it away.